Singlism

So, I've just read this book Singled out: how singles are stereotyped, stigmatized, and ignored, and still live happily ever after by Bella DePaulo.

I'm single. I live alone. I don't have children. I don't want to have children. I don't want to be part of a couple.

The book made me think about my life as a single. Whether I am actually happy and content in my life, or is it all self-deception.

It also made me think about whether I've encountered instances of 'singlism'...

This morning I heard one on the radio! About singles and buying apartments in the city... with the implication being that singles only need small apartments. I don't. My two-bedroom place is 90m² – and I'm growing out of it. Yeah, I really do need to sort that out at some point.

The most prevalent myth is the completeness one... or the just-need-to-find-the-right... one. That really annoys me.

I've never suffered from 'matrimania' - except as a teenager, when there is huge pressure to couple-up. I wish that I hadn't succumbed to it then. But, I got a great friend out of the deal - one of the most important people in my life. He's just not my partner. He - and his partner - are my friends. And I'm rocking the honorary-aunt status with his kids. He, and his family, are also vital to my family as a whole - they are part of us. I just wish that we stopped trying to work as a couple a lot sooner, to lessen the hurt. I don't work in a couple. To my last breath, I will regret the hurt I caused those young guys I tried to be normal for and with. All I can do is be grateful that the two I still know are happy in their lives. Oh yeah, and both are coupled with children. And, good on them.



The author discusses 10 myths about singles - so... do I fit? Do I agree?

Myth #1: The Wonder of Couples: Marrieds know best.
Do my coupled friends treat me like a child? Do I get included in parties / events, even though everyone else are couples?
Maybe I'm lucky with my friends and family... there are a lot of singles in my social / familial grouping - and it doesn't seem to make any difference in how we're treated.

Myth #2: Singled-Minded: You are interested in just one thing - getting coupled.
You know what - I'm really not. And no, it's not in a lady-doth-protest-too-much way. It's in a I'm-much-happier-without-having-to-put-up-with-someone-else way... Yep, I've had this one a few times. The whole you-just-haven't-found-the-right-man-yet attitude. Get this: there is no right man. (Or woman - just in case you thought I was gay). I don't want a partner.

Myth #3: The Dark Aura of Singlehood: You are miserable and lonely and your life is tragic.
Not so much. I'm happy. I am loved by my family and friends. I love them back. I'm not lonely - I am alone. And I like it that way. Too much people contact does my head in, and I want to scream and throw things at them.

Myth #4: It Is All About You: Like a child, you are self-centred and immature and your time isn't worth anything since you have nothing to do but play.
I'll admit to being selfish with my time and energy. I spend most of my time at work. I value my time alone. I spend most Sunday mornings breakfasting with my mother. I spend time with my oldest sister more days of the week than not (we often commute together in the mornings). I do volunteer work, and work for charities. Most nights I'm creating and crafting presents for family and friends.
Is that playing? Well, sometimes it's fun and enjoyable. Is any of that worthwhile? Yes. It is.

Myth #5: Attention, Single Women: You work won't love you back and your eggs will dry up. Also, you don't get any and you're promiscuous.
My work doesn't love me back - I know that. But, my workmates do. And, the customers I help are grateful I was there. Selfishly, most of the time I feel fulfilled in my work.
How do I know the people who work with me care? Because, if I'm not on top form, they ask questions. Not, why isn't she working as hard as should be?, but - is everything ok?
My eggs drying up? Please do. I didn't really want them in the first place. 28 years of pain each month... with more years to come.
I don't get any and/or are promiscuous. So? What has that got to do with anyone other than me? How many couples get any? Isn't that one of the myths of couplehood... sex is on tap?

Myth #6: Attention, Single Men: You are horny, slovenly and irresponsible, and you are the scary criminal. Or, you are sexy, fastidious, frivolous and gay.
Not being a man, I can't say much about this... but... I don't believe this myth, either.

Myth #7: Attention, Single Parents: Your kids are doomed.
I'm not a parent, single or otherwise. My dad was, for a time. So, for a couple of years I was raised by a single parent. Which is a complete lie. My parents didn't live in the same house (sometimes not the same city). But I had two parents. I also had older siblings, and aunts and uncles, and grandparents. And parental friends... I had a community around me to love and care for me. And, so do most kids - with sole parents or not. I'm part of those communities now, as an adult. What matters is the quality of love, attention, and care children receive - not how many parents they have around.

Myth #8: Too Bad You're Incomplete: You don't have anyone and you don't have a life.
I don't have anyone. YAY! I don't have a life? Maybe not to an outsider's perspective. But, it is my life - I've chosen it. And I love it. Just the right balance between sociability and solitude. God. The thought of having to put up with someone else's issues and crap and stuff in my life... Urgh. And, I am complete. I am me. Complete with attitude, ups and downs, issues, joys and successes.

Myth #9: Poor Soul: You will grown old alone and you will die in a room by yourself where no one will find you for weeks.
I am a daughter, sister, aunt, niece, cousin, great-aunt, friend. I love my family and friends. They love me back. I will be missed when I die. People will cry and mourn me. People will notice I'm not around. You won't be finding my body in weeks, and no one realised I'd died. Worse-case-scenario... would be from 11am(ish) Sunday morning through to 8am(ish) Tuesday... that's the longest period I go without contact with the outside world.
Incidentally, just because you have a partner and/or children, doesn't mean that you will be with any of them when you die.

Myth #10: Family Values: Let's give all the perks, benefits, gifts, and cash to couples and call it family values.
I read this chapter and thought - thank GOD I don't live in America. The benefits/taxes here aren't that weighted toward couples.
However - it would be nice to go on holiday alone, and not be penalised. Until that happens, I'm pretty sure I could drag along a single friend/family member... And have a whale of a time.

Maybe I've lucked out and my family and friends are so great nothing's made of my singlehood. Or, maybe things are a bit different here - and now... The book was published in 2006, and is based on the situation in America.

Stereotypes and shopping

A couple of months ago - on Fair Go - a nine-year-old perfectly expressed how I feel about clothes and jewellery. Check out the video here. 
Everything is pink and purple in girl-land - and hearts and ruffles.
Like young Shannon, I'm not a pink and purple and hearts and ruffles type of gal. I have no problem with those that are.
At least as a grown-up, I have more choice in clothes - black, really. Maybe some red or purple...
But jewellery... hmmmm... And decorations...
I don't do hearts. I don't do crosses. (I'm not a Christian, so why should I? Just like I don't do ankhs or hamsa. These are not my beliefs, but they are others. And I respect them, and show that by not wearing them as an accessory.)
And that is why I have spent four days dropping into a shop, trying to find jewellery I can cope with. 
The xx-genes in human females does not automatically indicate a preference for pink / purple / hearts / frills / lace / ruffles.
The xy-genes in human males does not automatically indicate a preference for navy / grey / cards / sport / fishing / argyle patterned socks.
So, here I am, struggling to express individuality when forced into boxes.
And you wonder why I knit, and make my own jewellery.

Thursday for a Thurday: techno taming

Ever feel like technology is taking over your life?
Most Tuesdays and Wednesdays, I'm sitting in front a computer for about 10 hours a day at work. Doing techie stuff. You know, email, internet stuff - research, searching, chat, updating webpages - working on documents and spreadsheets... Pretty much all work-related.
Thursdays - about six hours or so. Friday and Saturday, not so much. Also explains why I spend so much time of Saturday out from the workroom and from behind the desk.
This also explains why I'm a sporadic facebooker. And why I forget I have a brand-new twitter account.
And... why I only rarely actually plug-in-and-turn-on my broadband at home.
After hours at work spent in front of a screen - when I'm at home, I'd rather have the screen a few feet away - a TV screen, where I'm not expected to do anything, up to and including paying attention. And I'll knit.... or read. Or both at the same time.
I'm not that much of a techno-nut to enjoy being hooked in all the time.
And, that's my excuse for not updating my blog so much.
And the blogs I follow tend to be the ones that email me. The whole logging-on to yet ANOTHER account, or visiting ANOTHER site does my head in. Just email me any updates, damn it. Facebook - I remember to visit, because it emails me when I'm tagged.
Mea culpa.

Thoughts for a Thursday... mothers

Belated thoughts. I wrote this on Thursday, but computer access limited until now...

I've written about my mum and my nanas before. With Mother's day coming up, I wondered what more I had to say. Well, a lot really, but not all of it appropriate to a public forum. Instead, I thought about non-mothers - or, un-mothers, as my oldest sister and I call ourselves (and we sometimes give each other Happy Un-Mother's Day presents).

I think mothers (and fathers) are wonderful. I think the decision to have children, to nurture them - body & soul, mind & spirit - so they become amazing human beings, is a joyous thing.

But, I also think there is too much pressure and expectation to join this band.

Motherhood wasn't an option for me, for reasons that you don't need to know. They are my reasons.

Why do those of us without children - for whatever reasons - are made to feel somehow lesser beings?

Parenthood should be a choice, made with both emotion and logic. But it should not be a matter of public debate and discussion, particularly if you have not gone down that route.

I believe you can have a happy and fulfilled life with children. I believe you can have a happy and fulfilled life without children.

It is your choice.

It is your life.

The rest of the world can just butt out.

Another wish...

for headphones that cancel out the crap you really don't need to hear - but let you hear the stuff you do...
Well, would save people from throwing things at me to get my attention when I HAVE to listen to music (you ever met some of my workroom-mates?) in order to concentrate on my job...
BTW - it's my lunch break now...

Ranty McRanty #10 (or #5 part 2)

I've ranted about footpaths before... and it continues!

So - my new suggestion - let's set up road rules for footpaths. A slow lane - for those texting, sightseeing, indecisive, dawdling. A fast lane. And keep left...

Errgg!

Ranty McRanty part something

Shame on you...
So - a quick search will show that Newstalkzb has a news item about this. And lots of the newspapers on Stuff. So does TV3. There's even a link on the NY Daily News.
But, no matter how I search... I can't find anything on the NZHerald or TVNZ sites.
Maybe I just imagined that piece on the news last night...

Anyway - here's the official site for the complete list of winners and other stuff. And a post for work I wrote about the ceremony.

Reflections of a solitary hamster*

I don't look forward to this time of year - the whole Valentine's thing. It's not because I'm single, and feel horrid/left out/strange being single and the whole world seems obsessed by pairing people up - it's because the whole world is obsessed with pairing people up+.

The other day, I heard someone on the radio talk about a new book which encouraged women to accept 'Mr Ok' - that women were too picky, and that's why they were single. The commentator made some valid points - before I had managed to stop sputtering - that the single women he knew were really happy being single. That, if they got into a relationship, then he had to be really great for her to change her way of life. That such books assume women need to have a man to be complete.
Thanks Mr Commentator - I'm with you.
I am happy - content - with my life. I am too selfish, messy, lazy - to share a house with people - let alone a life & relationship.
So, I'll be spending this Valentine's alone - as always, and as I like it.
+on that note - why do magazine horoscopes ALWAYS assume you are in - or want to be in - a relationship? Where's the section for 'happily single'?
*Thanks Seanfish for the inspiration of the title of this post... it all makes sense here. And, no, I don't love anyone enough to share my last waffle.

Thoughts on Father's Day

A little Ranty McRanty, I'm afraid.

Now, I had a great dad. And so did all my siblings. We all miss him terribly. And so do his grandchildren. He was the head of our family and, quite probably, the heart too.

Now, my brother-in-law has taken over as the head boy, as it were. And his kids love him, so do his grandchildren. He's a great dad. I'm sure my nieces & nephews also think their dad, my brother, is great.

I work with great dads. I know lots of people with great dads. I know more people with great dads than I do people with not-so-great dads.

So... when I came to put together lists of books for father's day for work, there was a problem.

Oh, not with picture books. Of course not! Dads in picture books are mostly great - some are goofy. Even the divorced dads are pretty great.

But... when it came to children's fiction, something changed. Do you know how difficult it was to find great dads?!?! Apart from Danny, the champion of the world by Roald Dahl, that is! There are 2 Elvis impersonator dads - two!!! If dads aren't absent, druggies, in prison, abusive... they're generally embarrassing. What is with that?!?!

I didn't bother looking for teen books. It could be much the same.

Why?!?

When the reality is that MOST dads are great, yes maybe a little goofy & a little embarrassing - but... in a collection as large & varied as ours, why was it such a struggle to find such dads? Because... I'm struggling for reasons really.

Maybe it's like the 'real world' and who wants to read about real world, when you can read about worlds worse than yours.

But why????

And now - I'm heading off to spend Father's Day with some of my dad's work, my brother-in-law, my other brother-in-law's great dad, and my friend who is just about to become a dad - I'm sure he'll be great, too. Oh, and various other relatives. But a lot of great dads, in a place we can all celebrate my great dad.

I wish he was here to celebrate with us. I miss you Dad. Really do. You were great. And our grief is testiment to that.

The (cat) pee wars

I understand the WHY of it all... but it's still driving me to distraction (and into overdraft)...

Molly is having territorial disputes with the cat (possibly cats) next door, who treat the catflap as an invitation to visit.

The problem is, Molly is used to ruling the roost - and the neighbourhood - but she's not the tough 6-year-old she was when she last had to assert dominance. She's 12½ now, and things are different.

I've had to wash clothes I don't wear, because they were left in a pile to sort out (the dress-up wardrobe).

I've had to wash a handbag. It wasn't my paranoia after all, it DID smell of cat pee...

I've had to wash a pillow that fell off my bed. Oh, and get the washing machine fixed after that resulted in a split pillow and fluff all through the machine. But, hey!, first time it's been serviced in its 15+ years of life! Note to self: don't try that again.

I've had to buy carpet deodorises, carpet sprays, anti-pet smell sprays, room deodorises, extra litter tray, litter...

Oh, and a new umbrella. It was in the handbag. Yeah, ok, I bought more than one umbrella - but I feel they should also be fashion accessories and match your outfit. I've just never bothered before.

So, all up, this territorial dispute has cost $300+ and counting...

And a few hours of lost sleep as the sound of fighting cats wakes me up and I have to get up and chase evil trespassing cat/s away...

And - no - a magnet catflap will not work. That presupposes my cat would keep a collar on. Not going to happen.

By the way - that's Molly getting close to her friend, the heater. So, yes, she costs me money too, because I've had to start the timer on the heaters earlier than I would otherwise, to keep her warm.

And the person who suggested that I might like to reconsider my decision to have a Molly in my life - you've got to be joking. This whole situation is total and utter pain - and expensive - but my life without her wouldn't be worth it, you cold-hearted non-pet owner.

That's not manners is it...

Somehow or other I came across Why manners matters: the case for civilized behavior in a barbarous world by Lucinda Holdforth.

It's been a fascinating read with many sections resonating. But, with my fairly new living conditions, the one that got me was right at the beginning with the author discussing living in a block of units but not 'succesfully relating to each other' and each being 'urban hermits'.

There are 12 units - three blocks of four - where I live, and a house behind them that shares our driveway. There is at least one empty unit, but still that's a lot of humanity in a reasonably small space. I know the name of one of neighbours, because the people (of indeterminate number) in that unit are a bit suspicious of people around the area (could be fear or guilt, trust me...). I know the name of another neighbour, because he does the lawnmowing and needed to check in about payment...

I know there's someone next door who has small boys (two or three, I'm not sure) who visit most weekends - you can tell they're there, because the noise level goes from 'is the place occupied' to 'herd of elephants'. But those boys are the only people who have willingly said hi to me in six weeks.

I don't want to develop a close friendship with them all, but being able to say 'hi' and have it responded to would be nice - civilised. I've tried. I introduced myself as a walked passed a couple I saw cleaning their car one weekend, but they just said 'oh, you've just moved into number 11' - it was only latter I learnt his name (the lawnmowing guy).

If it wasn't for lights going on and off, I'd swear most of the places were empty. You just don't see anyone! The boys visiting #10 are the only ones outside. No one uses the clotheslines (including me, admittedly, but I don't hang my washing up on the balcony for it to blow all over the place). Tell a lie, I did hang towels up one day - but the weather hasn't quite been up to it, really!

I'm an urbanite, born and bred, but still say 'hi' to people I walk past on my way to the bus early in the morning - some even say 'hi' back. There's one woman who just glares at me, so I don't dare say a word. There's a man I often wait at the bus stop besides. Over the last couple of days we've started smiling and saying 'hi' to each other. Small steps.

I say 'good morning' or 'hi' to the bus driver. I say 'thanks' and wave when I get off the bus... I usually say 'hi' to shop assistants, too, and 'thanks' - and try not to impolitely have conversations with others while I'm being served. Doesn't always mean I'll chat to the assistant - but I'm not ignoring them or treating them like robots or slaves...

Is it so hard to treat our fellow human beings with civility and politeness?

What makes a good book... Or Ranty McRanty #7

Who knows!
Email lists I'm on have been full of discussion over the New Zealand Post Book Awards winners. I understand, agree, and sympathise with many of the comments.

The 10 PM question - yes, it's lovely - but seems more an adult book - or one of those dreaded cross-over thingies. I say it's lovely, but I couldn't remember whehter I'd read it or not, until I was reading the third chapter... For this reason, Storylines didn't include Elizabeth Knox's Dreamhunter (the Esther Glen winner) in their Notable Books List.

Old Drumble - again, a great book, but of little appeal to current children. A nostalgic visit to childhood - one with little relevance to today's 'cotton wool' generation.

Roadworks - this hasn't gone down that well amongst primary school students - the kids most of the email list members work with - but I work with preschoolers - and this rocks!!! Perfect storytime book. [by the way - why didn't we have Big Burly Blokes reading books!

Piggity-Wiggity Jiggity Jig - reads well aloud.

The Were-Nana - creepy and fun.

Violence 101 - a workmate hates this book - sees it as a how-to manual on how to be violent. I like its grittiness and raw honesty. Teens who might 'need' such a manual, aren't always the teens who read.

What would be my books of the year? Based on the Storylines Notable Books List:

Picture book: Roadworks, although I am very tempted by The Apple. Both are true picture books - that is, where image and text work perfectly together to make a whole.

Junior fiction: Freaky Fish - how wonderful to get two books (the other being Big fish, little fish) for the younger age group that work really well, and stand up against books for older readers! I picked this one because it is part of a series for younger readers, but doesn't read like a 'reader' - it has character, plot, pace, development - and it doesn't have a pat ending.

Young adult fiction: The tomorrow code - science wonderfully integrated into story - an unashamedly New Zealand book that has sold to the US, while keeping its NZ identity. Bravo Brian.

Non-fiction: Atoms, dinosaurs and DNA - educational, interesting, and readable. What all non-fiction should be. Although, I have a fondness for Learn to skateboard with Luka - like fiction, it is rare to find good non-fiction aimed at younger children.

I remember having a discussion a couple of years ago over Genesis by Bernard Beckett. Colleagues whose opinions I respect had great issue with putting this book on the Storylines Notable Books list. They couldn't see an audience for it - in that it is a teen book, but what teenagers would be interested in reading it?

I, however, argued that it didn't necessarily make it unsuitable for inclusion. For all its faults (too much scientific content, not always seamlessly incorporated into the story, for example) it is a truly notable books - it has taken New Zealand teen literature a step further. It has amazing world-building. It does what good science fiction is supposed to do: hold a mirror to our current society and makes you seriously think about where we are at, and where we are heading.

I don't see the point of sitting at meetings discussing books when whether a book is 'notable' or not comes down to 'I didn't like it' or 'I loved it'. Yeah, sure, personal preferences/prejudices can - and do - influence your opinion, but... this isn't a decision about whether you buy/keep the book. Personal opinion, unsupported by facts, should NOT be how books are judged, in a formal context. It should be 'I don't think that the pictures and story work together' or 'that character development is unconvincing' or 'their action doesn't match the personality so far portrayed in the story'.

When on a judging panel personal preferences shouldn't outweigh quality. Someone on a notables panel with me didn't bother reading Single Fin by Aaron Topp - because they didn't like/get surfing. WTF?!? I don't either - but the book ISN'T all about surfing! Surfing is the acitivity that moulds the book, the characters, and acts as support. What the book IS is about Fin's grief, his community, and love - love of activity, love of friends, love of nature. It is staggering for a first novel.

We often wonder whether we're judging a book on its own merits - or on the backlist of the author. It IS hard, excluding a much-loved author from the notables list, but sometimes it IS necessary. Honestly, I love Margaret Mahy - but The Magician of Hoad is not one of Margaret's better works but, not only that, it just isn't a good fantasy novel.

Here endeth the rant...

Betrayed

How little things can affect your childhood memories...
No raisin-box whistles anymore - and I've heard stories about Spaceman lollies...
Then, after years of waiting, my favourite book - ever - in the whole world! - has been turned into a movie. I know that can be bad - "never judge a book by its movie" [JW Egan]. But I wasn't expecting this bad...
So, here's my not-that-detailed review of The little white horse - and here's a review of the movie, The secret of Moonacre - and the website of the movie, including a trailor.
That's one movie I won't be going to see...
Just - yuck!

Umbrellas

Last May I bemoaned the lack of umbrella etiquette - imagine my joy, then to see this blog entry on this very subject!
If only people followed such advice...
Next step - making people walk on the left of the footpath...

Ranty McRanty #6

Moving on from footpath rage... there's public transport - really BUS, rage...
Assuming you made it to your bus stop in time (you realise, of course, that the bus will be running late on the days you have RUN for it) and you wait, patiently, with your bus pass in hand. Then the bus arrives and you queue politely and patiently - while trying to stand your ground against the people who just showed up & pushed their way into the queue - assuming there is only one queue. Some bus queues can be two-pronged. Then, before you, will be the person who - for reasons known only to themselves, but possibly involve the fact their lineage might include lesser demons from hell - wait until they're actually facing the driver before hunting in their bag for their purse/wallet/bus pass/money... a process taking unnecessary time...
Sort it out...

Ranty McRanty #5

Enough of road rage - it's hard for me to be involved, seeing as I don't drive - but footpath rage... don't get me started!
If you don't know where you're going - please don't try to orientate yourself by walking out of a shop & stopping immediately in the flow of traffic - try in the doorway of the shop - not in the middle of the footpath!
Why did they make the footpath's on Queen Street wider? So they could fit more human snails walking x-number abreast down them!!! Because, you know, I'm now running late for my bus because people made me late! Either a staff mate didn't take over on desk in time, or a customer couldn't decide what they hell they wanted. Sorry - I do have a life - and an hour+ bus trip home... If I miss this bus, then I'll be getting home about 2 hours after I finished work. How's that for fun!!!
Or, maybe I'm trying to get back to work after my lunch break so I don't do to the people on desk, the same that was done to me. Yeah, be late, I don't mind having a 40min break... because I'm conscientuous, and will make sure you get your hour... maybe more, because you've been held up in footpath insanity.
Please don't change your mind - and direction - randomly, making the 20+ people around you swing & all squish up...
Actions like this make us all pissed off, and adds to the joy of life... Just makes me so joyful to be at work in the city...
Note to self: will not moan about work and workplace from now until they stop reading in a couple of months. Just had to clear my system.

Test cricket dead? and pretty in pink

After watching the South Africa vs Australia test series, as much as possible - you'd have to say test cricket - good test cricket - was alive and well.

It had (almost) everything you'd want - drama, courage, ups, downs - the pendulum swung so much it almost became detached. Graeme Smith's gutsy return to the crease with broken arm. I thought only old-school All Blacks did that sort of thing. Photo stolen from PA images, via Cricinfo.

After 15 days of cricket, in total, it all came down to 5 minutes. Come on, how much closer do you need to get?

On that - look at the photo. Notice the colour of the wickets? And, if you look really closely, the colour of the 3 on the Aussie fielder's uniform? Why? It comes from Cricket Australia's support of the McGrath Foundation - set up by former cricketer Glenn McGrath & his wife Jane, to fund specialist breast care nurses in areas currently without them.

If you happened to watch any of the recent Rugby League World Cup, you might have noticed the lovely pink jersey's the refs were wearing. That's because the World Cup supported breast cancer charities.

And, what do we do in New Zealand? It seems that everything we do for Breast Cancer research & funding & support is focussed on women. Understandable, of course, but by being out there - and pink - these Aussie sportsmen (leaguies in particular!) are showing they're not afraid to wear pink for a good cause.

My organisation? Well, we're lucky to get 10 people on the Dove Pink Star Walk a year.

4D gloom

No! Depression has struck my family... and the guessing begins - who will/should be the 11th incarnation?

PS notice how the first comments at the bottom of the article are all from women? Photo stolen from Times site, too

Winter wonder and woe

There are things I love about winter...
The clothes; the coats; the hats; the scarves... Western Springs on a cold morning. The crispness of the air.
There are things I loathe about winter...
The main one is - the lack of umbrella etiquette. Is it so hard to keep your (furled) umbrella close to your side - not sticking out behind you, ready to skewer unwary pedestrians?

Ranty McRanty #4 part 2 (another long one)

or... further confessions of a reader of 'crap'.
My history of reading popular, 'crap' fiction started early. Dr Seuss' Green eggs and ham, for example (now a classic and exemplar of beginner readers). Got sucked in to the Blyton thing - Famous Five (couldn't stand the Secret Seven) and Six cousins of Mistletoe Farm. Alfred Hitchcock and the Three Investigators. Trixie Belden (still hunting the elusive last book in the series - have up to #38. Used to buy one a week with our groceries, if I'd been good $1.99 at Three Guys). Couldn't stand Nancy Drew. Asterix (not Tintin).
Then secondary school... in came the romance novel. Barbara Cartland and Georgette Heyer, courtesy of my mum. Still re-read Georgette. Harlequin romances (big sister's collection) - not Mills & Boons (too tame). The Sweet Valley books started coming in around this time - but I'd already moved on to some other hefty tomes. Satanic rituals? Barbara Cartland's occasional dabble with the occult had nothing on the Dennis Wheatley novels I borrowed from mum's shelves.
Kids books I still have - The trolley car family by Clymer. The Little White Horse by Goudge (mentioned in my previous entry). This even won the Carnegie Medal. Boston's Green Knowe books - still have a boxed set.
On the subject of medals/awards... I'm with Robin McKinley, who has won a few and whose books I treasure and re-read... extracted from an online essay
Do you remember Newbery books from your childhood?
In fifth grade well-intentioned librarians tried to force me to read Newbery Medal books because they felt I had reread The Black Stallion quite often enough and my horizons needed broadening. My utter loathing of anything with a sticker on the cover dates from then. I grew up knowing that stickers on the cover meant Grown Ups Think This Book Is Good For You But It Will Bore You To Death. I still can't recall Hitty: Her First Hundred Years without blanching.
What was your response to learning you had won?
And therefore, my first reaction to being told that I'd won the Newbery was, Oh, no! No child in his or her right mind will ever pick up Hero again! (Or, for that matter, Sword, which was an honor book and so had a sticker too.) I have been told, severely, that the Newbery has changed since I was in fifth grade. I have read a lot of more recent Newbery winners and honor books and it's true, they have changed, but I'm sorry, I still approach anything with a sticker on the cover with caution.
I like reading children's and teens' books - and 'formulaic' genre fiction like romance and fantasy - because the authors aren't so tied up with showing off their writerly skills. A child review once said/wrote in a review for the library - enough will all the adjectives, just get on with the story. Yep, I agree. I read description, description, blah, blah, blah, yadda, yadda, YAY action! Story! Finally! No - more description.
It's all in how it's handled. Robin McKinley can go off on tangents - but they're not writely, showing off tangents - they're more stream-of-consciousness, written from the first person and giving a real insight into the inner workings of the character's mind.